a tiny snippet of a winding revelation

The sun awoke me this morning by invading my privacy, church bells chimed as he emanated from the shutters. with no hope of any more sleep i stepped onto the balcony and was greeted by that salty breeze dancing in the air of a mediterranean morning. i have mountains of a velvet, caramel color behind me and the expanse of the sea ahead of me slightly hidden by an olive tree in the garden below. It's only early morning byt already its hot and i feel lazy.
Hours later, i lounge on the chaise-longue with an alcoholic beverage in my hand, after all i am once again in europe where drinking before lunch time is welcomed if not even encouraged. I no longer admire the view but instead dwell on my recent loss. I feel bereaved, as if a tiny piece of me was ripped away, stolen and stripped until my soul was revealed upon the finder of my loss. I have lost my diary, my accumulated writings of the euro-tripper adventure. Thoughts and memories, emotions and rambles all evaporated and forgotten, left for an other to find.
The beach:

Miriam and i finally took the plunge and indulged in out first bathing session in the sea, Salty cold water enveloped me as i swam and then in continuous movement surveyed the view. I have become too romantic for my own good, always dwelling on the future and nostalgically recalling the past. it is in the most beautiful places that harbor the darkest of secrets. Like lost jewels at the bottom of the ocean where only certain eyes can observe the sorrows behind the misleading beauty.
Last i had a tarrot reading, a common ocurence in these parts of the worldwhere spirituality still is more powerful than materialism. People meddle with forces, some known logically and scientifically proven and others imagined, they gather together and take time to read their fortunes in the images of tarrot cards. tanya was to be my oracle that evening. I sat, pensive in front of her, my best friend's mother, following her instructions and hanging on to every word she uttered. My task, simple, to think of a problem, a matter that i wanted clarity upon. My thoughts began to wonder the tremendous landscape of my mind, my inner world, my only privacy. I wanted an accurate reading so i had to settle on one subject, love life should be fun, i remember thinking but the brown stain that is a constant reminder began meddling with my thoughts. My reading was nothing too revelatory, perhaps my cynicism diluted the full force of this ancient custom. in short my self confidence must improve.
xx